Spotlight Series

Spotlight: N-o-nS…e;nSI/c::::a_L

This summer, Daily Serving is shining a light on some of the commendable arts publications that we regularly read, and this week we’re spending some time with N-o-nS…e;nSI/c::::a_L. Today we bring you an excerpt from Los Angeles-born and -based artist EJ Hill’s text, “An Utter Disregard of the Potential for (and the Likelihood of) Complete and Total Ruin,” after Lauryn Hill’s legendary Miseducation album. Co-founder Vivian Sming writes, “The album’s lessons on love create an echo that follows the reader, chasing Hill down a tunnel of lost loves and heartbreaks. Hill’s emotional life is funny, soft-tragic, contemporaneously self-absorbed, and simultaneously heartfelt in its sincerity and relatability. It’s a picture of love and the romantic problems contingent with our hyper-consumeristic and fleeting moment.” “An Utter Disregard” was first published in N-o-nS…e;nSI/c::::a_L’s second issue, (meaning), in 2015.

When It Hurts So Bad

As someone who is constantly falling in love, whether it is reciprocated or not, I can assure you that being in love is just as tortuous as those times when I am not in love. It’s basically like all the same shit, always. And that’s not my heartfelt sentimentality finally giving way to cynicism. No, it’s just the actual reality of things. All things have a little bit of good and a little bit of bad. Some things are more good than bad, and vice versa, but when it comes to love, it is all completely insane, and it is the one thing that will start and end a war all in the same breath.

I just bought the new Alabama Shakes album, Sound and Color, and overdrafted my bank account for it because their last album, Boys & Girls, was kind of another love/love lost anthem for me. And from what little I heard of this new album, I knew it was going to be a good follow-up—the perfect soundtrack to this current moment. Maybe I should just put art on hold and start writing music again.

Did you know that before going to art school, I pursued a music career? I played open mic gigs and coffee shops, stuff like that. Played my acoustic guitar on the streets and subway platforms à la Tracy Chapman circa whenever that was. In any case, I don’t even know who that person is anymore, but it was totally real, and I was so 100% all about it. Maybe love is kind of like that: So real when you’re in it, but looking back, you’re like “LOL, bye.” Like the studio apartment you shared with your boyfriend when you were 22 years old, not quite a child anymore but barely an adult, still referring to him as your “friend” when your mom asks through the phone, “Who’s that?”

Continue reading the essay here.

Share

Leave a Reply